Anxiety & Autonomy: How Being My Own Boss Bettered My Mental Health
Anxiety has been with me since childhood, shaping how I saw and experienced the world. Back in the early noughties, I was often told that I ‘worried too much’ or was ‘just being over-sensitive’. From a young age, there were many situations in which my anxiety would manifest. The triggers could be related to anything and everything but usually the anxiety showed itself most strongly prior to social situations or the anticipation of ‘the unknown’.
I was lucky enough to have a very supportive network around me during my most difficult days. I had an incredibly understanding family and a hugely knowledgeable doctor and therapist who were there when the anxiety would cross over into more of a depressive state (I know that this isn’t the case for many sufferers).
Work Triggers
After finishing a degree in Philosophy at university, I launched into a career in events and marketing at big fashion and interiors firms. I worked with some incredibly inspiring people and learned quickly. Those years taught me so much about client communication, managing multiple projects, the importance of detail, event planning as well as PR in the luxury brand world. I’m grateful for the lessons and the people I learned from, but the politics and shifting power dynamics of office life often felt overwhelming. Ultimately, I found myself slipping back into familiar spirals of over-analysis, self-doubt and constant worry.
Finding Another Way
Five years on, I knew something had to change. I’d always been drawn to design in its various forms and for me, the graphic design industry provided the perfect balance between creativity and logic.
I retrained as a graphic designer in 2015 at Shillington College in London and set up Isabel & Ink about a year later. The course was one of the most intensive yet fulfilling experiences of my life. My days started before sunrise on the tube, ended late at night with more assignments and weekends were no different. For three months, I barely saw the outside world but for the first time, I was doing work I genuinely loved. Instead of draining me, it gave me energy. Every day I felt myself learning and building towards something bigger, something that could finally be my own.
College piece - kids postcards promoting the importance of mental health
College piece - The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe book cover design
My Structure
Setting up my own business gave me the urgency and accountability I hadn’t found elsewhere. No one was responsible for me but me. I wasn’t beholden to anyone and failing didn’t feel like an option because I’d already tried the alternative and knew it wasn’t for me.
Working for myself hasn’t erased anxiety, but it has reshaped how I live with it. One advantage of a hyper-vigilant mind is that I am naturally organised. I don’t like leaving a task unfinished, I cannot abide an inbox full of unread emails and I honestly don’t think I’ve ever been late to anything. This does come with its own pitfalls as yes, I am that person, sitting alone in a café, waiting for her friends 20 minutes before the agreed meeting time.
That said, not every creative finds structure easy. My advice: carve out time each day for the “boring bits” such as the admin, the finances, the emails, so the creative flow feels lighter.
A Few Things That Helped Me Early On (and still do):
Talk to people who’ve done it before. Entrepreneurs, accountants, lawyers, mentors… anyone who can share real experiences, especially about areas that are less familiar to you.
Do your research. Read, listen, learn and keep asking questions about the parts of business you don’t naturally understand.
Keep connections. I still reach out to peers, friends and experts today, it keeps ideas fresh and stops me from feeling isolated.
Make time for admin. Do the small, necessary tasks daily so they don’t block your creativity. Don’t delay them especially if they can be done quickly and easily.
Create your own systems. Label files properly, keep your inbox clear, declutter your desk, even switch your phone to Airplane mode when you need focus.
My first desk space in London back in 2016
My desk in Hampshire now in 2025
My Perspective
One of the best things about working for myself is waking up without that familiar sense of dread, wondering what the office might throw at me. I don’t replay conversations at night anymore or worry if I annoyed someone with a throwaway comment (classic people pleaser problems).
Sure, there are moments I miss bouncing ideas around with colleagues, but I’ve gained so much more in genuine connections. Clients who’ve become friends. Suppliers I really trust. A small business community that feels supportive and celebratory.
And while there are still tough days, I’ve learnt how much difference boundaries make. Saying no to projects that don’t feel right. Not working weekends. Charging fairly for my time. These small commitments protect my energy. Read more on this topic from a previous blog post.
Final Thoughts:
I know I’m lucky to have been able to take this path. Self-employment isn’t for everyone. There are huge benefits to being employed such as stability, a regular payslip, a team around you. But for me, stepping out on my own was the right choice.
Nearly ten years into Isabel & Ink, with three children and a move out of London, my mental health feels stronger than it ever did in a traditional job. Having the autonomy to shape my working life has been the single most powerful tool in quieting my anxiety.
Over to you:
If you’ve ever felt the pull between anxiety and ambition, I’d love to hear your story. Share your thoughts in the comments below or email me. And if you’re considering a rebrand or new website, my books open again from March 2026 so now’s a great time to join the waitlist and plan ahead.
